Where Focus Goes, Energy Flows

For several years, Mrs. Wren has elected to use (what was supposed to be) a decorative birdhouse that hangs right by our patio door.  Each year, she returns to hatch a new batch of babies. We always know she's back because wrens have a distinctive musicality.

Anyway, once the babies have hatched, her sole focus is food.  She is back and forth and back and forth, feeding her babies.  And no matter how long she is gone, they always act like they are starved, pushing to the front/top so they can get the juiciest bits of wriggly creature in Mama's mouth. 

Everyday, competing thoughts, worries and emotions wrestle to the forefront of our minds, wanting to be fed by our time and energy.  Like Mrs. Wren, we are in constant motion - if not physically, then emotionally - feeding those thoughts.  Similar to the baby birds in the nest, our thoughts, worries, and emotions all compete for attention, jockeying for prime real estate in our minds. Not surprisingly, the noisiest, pushiest, and most demanding of those are fed first.  From what I can see, Mrs. Wren's decisions about whom to feed first is not based on priority or hierarchy of need.  She just does what she is programmed to do: Find the food and dump the food into an open mouth.  

I think we do the same thing.  Our time and energy is sopped by whatever has pushed ahead in our minds: A worry about a child, friend, or situation? A repetitive thought about a financial issue, something dumb we said, or a job task? Shame? Guilt? Irrational fear? And of course, the noisiest, pushiest, and most demanding (and destructive) of all: Anger. 

At least, that's the most frequent, uninvited guest in my head these days - anger.  The past year and a half have been personally challenging, with a steady flow of unexpected criticism, accusations, and meanness in my direction.  The result has been strong feelings of betrayal, mistrust, and of course, anger.  Operating under the premise that my actions and reactions are my responsibility, I have moved forward, trying to counteract the unkindness towards me with kindness from me. Still, the anger simmers below the surface, and I generally keep a tight lid on it.  Even so, that's maintenance of a problem, not a solution.

And then, as I was watching the Wren family, I started thinking.  Whatever you feed is what grows and gets stronger.  The babies in the nest who push forward are getting fed more and more frequently; they will leave the nest first.  If Mrs. Wren doesn't feed the others, they will die.  

What you feed, grows.  What you don't feed, dies. 

What you focus on, grows, becomes bigger and stronger.  

Eventually, just like the baby birds, it will all fly away. It just won't matter anymore.  But for now, "where focus goes, energy flows." 

So I guess the decision is about what to feed - determining the focus and subsequent energy. . .goals, joys, daily "glimmers," relationships of my choice. . .

and what not to feed. . .insecurities, negativity, disappointments, and yes, anger. 

Where focus goes, energy flows.