It's award show season. The Grammys are done, so the next big-ticket awards show is the Oscars. Mostly, I like to watch to check out the clothes and hair. Sadly, I usually have not seen most of the films up for Oscars, so it does not matter much to me who wins and who loses.
Nevertheless, when a "winner" mounts the podium, he or she is allowed the obligatory 30 seconds in which s/he can thank or express admiration for whomever s/he feels has helped him/her to the big moment. Most people get into trouble because their list is far too long; they just don't have enough time to name all the necessary people. That's the way of it in life. You can't think just one person. Like Hillary Clinton said, "It takes a whole village to raise a child." (I don't think the line was originally hers, but you get the idea). That gets me to thinking about who I admire.
Like the majority of people, I can't just stop at one person. Typically, when I admire someone, I admire something about the person. To explain, s/he has a character trait that I admire and aspire to be in my own life. Let me show you what I mean.
Not surprisingly, I admire my husband. Nope, I don't have to say that, and he would probably never guess that I would say that. Mike, for all practical purposes, is the exact opposite of me even though we agree on the big things in life (i.e values). Where I am a spastic, neurotic perfectionist, he is Mr. Chill. That's not to say he doesn't get bent out of shape about things, but for the most part, he just takes life as it comes.
I admire the fact that he can lie down or settle in to watch mindless TV for a half hour without feeling an ounce of guilt. He has come to know and understand the value of rest. Batteries have to be re-charged, and he has no problem taking the time to do that - guilt-free.
I suppose it's narcissistic of me to say so, but I admire him because he loves me. I am a jerk. I can be so self-involved, inflexible, and loud. . . but he still loves me anyway. . and tell me that frequently. He also thinks I'm good-looking, which I totally do not get. I'm fat, 40, and saggy, but Saturday night, Rick, Rhonda, Brandon, Mandi, Mike and I were all squashed into Famous Dave's, waiting for a table. Mike was behind me about two or three people, and I was looking at the diners. Suddenly, my phone vibrates with a text message. It's Mike; he had texted, "You look so sexy." Really? After 20 years of marriage?
I also admire my friend, Amy. She is reserved and respectable. She is able to maintain her integrity because she keeps her mouth shut. That's not to say she isn't effective. When a question is posed, she will thoughtfully consider it, and with brevity and wisdom, will present a response that will cause all listeners to sit back and say, "Oh, she's right." That's what I love about her - quiet strength and wisdom.
It will be two years ago now that she was battling breast cancer. I'm sure she had horrible days, but I never saw that side of her. She remained poised, positive, and absolutely focused in her faith. She was "grace under pressure" in practice. What a sermon her life has been.
Even though she is a very different woman than what I once knew, I admire Grandma B for the most part. She and I are so much alike, and I guess I recognized that fact at any early age. I loved Grandma, and I loved being around her. I used her as a role model in my own spiritual habits. Now, I'm not so sure if that was a good thing, but I still admire her for the influence she had on my life.
I admire Grandma Ryks, who has been dead for over twenty years. I never thought I would miss her as much as I do. I admire her sweetness, her kindness, and her gentleness. Whenever I am baking, I am reminded of her. I have her "baking stool" near my kitchen; every time I see it, I am reminded of her sitting on the stool, mixing up a batch of cookies. I ache for the ability to have just five minutes more with her.
I admire my parents for sacrificing so that I could attend private school and have a solid base for my faith.
I admire my cousin, Lisa, for her persistene in spite of her health issues. Even though it iconfuses me at times, I also admire her commitment to her family - extended and immediate.
I admire Rhonda for her generous heart. Everything she has she shares with others, especially her lake place. Even though she might want a weekend to herself just to relax and get away from it all, she (and Rick) are always inviting people. Likewise, I admire her self-control. I have never seen her get un-glued. Never. And I have never heard her utter a curse word. Never.
I admire my friend, Sher, for opening her heart and home. She and Senez bent over backwards and sacrificed greatly so that Sheldon could be a part of their family. And now, Nkia has joined the brood too. What a living testimony.
I admire Pastor Paul of AG church who does not think of his calling in terms of salary, benefits, hours, and responsibilities. He is a full-time pastor in every sense of the word. His ministry extends far beyond the walls of a church.
I could go on and on and on by referencing friends, students, students' parents, colleagues, etc. Most everyone I meet impacts me in some way - both good and bad (as in helping make the decision NOT to follow in his/her footsteps). Our lives are just so interconnected, and that's how God intended it to be. We were not meant to live in isolation, but together. Likewise, we are each wired uniquely and specifically for this place and time and purpose (Psalms 139).
I'm not going to lie; I frequently lose sight of that truth. I feel purposeless, and I have even argued with God that it's ok for Him to admit that He made a mistake in making me - everyone does it - but that can't possibly be true when I consider how each of us impact another. We are all specially pre-determined dominoes who have been specifically placed for a purpose. God juxtaposes people for His plan. Each talent, interest, and yes, deficit is uniquely aligned with another of His children, so that His Will may be done. I think God smiles when we admire traits in one another because a) He put them there - we are enjoying His handiwork, and b) as believers, we are recognizing God in others, which brings glory to Him, and everybody wins. The sin is when we recognize and celebrate the trait in others by disparaging the lack of it in our own lives. Our focus moves from Him to us; hence, sin.
I was thinking about this domino theory thing the other day after I had been talking to Amy. She has a friend named Mary, and Mary grew up Catholic but isn't so hot on the whole church/religion thing. In the past, Mary has challenged Amy regarding spiritual issues, and the "sparring" usually leaves Amy exhausted. . .but Mary always keeps coming back for more.
Enter into this scene, Pastor Paul from AG. Pastor Paul makes weekly or bi-weekly (can't remember) visits through the establishment where both Mary and Amy work. He visits them both. Recently, after visiting Mary, she requested a Bible from Paul, which he gladly obliged. Later, he went to visit Amy and told her what happened and encouraged her to continue her conversations with Mary.
See? Mary, Paul, and Amy are their own Godly dominoes branch. God aligned them specifically for this time and place, and each are being obedient to His plan. There are no accidents, and even when we can't see to the end of the dominoes row, we can be encouraged to know that a loving, conscientious hand has placed us in just the right spot to make a contribution to the game.
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