The first has to do with an answer to prayer. Maybe. I know that God is always answering prayer (that's not the revelation), and I also know, based on personal experience, that He rarely answers prayer in the expected way. For the most part, I love that. It just reinforces that He is in control, and I'm not, and I find tremendous peace and comfort in that.
Anyway, I have been praying for about a year that God would, when HE feels it's the right time, send good friends into my daughter's life - friends who will come alongside her and help her to grow in her faith. Without getting into too many details, my daughter has largely had some terrible friends and influences in her life. I'm not saying that they have all been heinous (although, several have), but hey definitely have not helped her to develop a strong faith or make good decisions.
Enter X (totally using a nondescript initial to throw off any speculation as to who it is).
For the past year, X has been a total burr in my saddle. X is one of the few people in life with whom I have just straight-up had a problem. I don't want to get into it, but the bottom line is that I have serious trust issues with X. On the outside, X is generally admired by all and checks all the right life choice boxes to be admired by all. I, however, saw a different side to X this year - one that I interpreted as manipulative and harmful. Anyway, X is one of two people with whom I have struggled within the past year.
Well, wouldn't you know that X has repeatedly been in contact with my daughter. Now based on what I told you, you probably might think that X is up to something. Well, she is. She just wants to get to know my daughter and build a relationship with her. Period. X has been completely appropriate, supportive, kind, and loving to my daughter.
I'm going to be honest. I'm still not sure about X. I can't quite decide if this is just another manipulative ploy, or if possibly X and I just got off on the wrong foot - that X is actually a good and decent person, and that through a series of unfortunate circumstances, she and I diverged instead of converged.
The jury is still out on that one.
Suffice it to say, though, I have prayed about X for a long time. You know that part of the Lord's Prayer that says, "Forgive our sins as we forgive those who sin against us?" Yeah, X is one of two people who always come to mind at that part, and so I have been asking God to soften my heart - I have been praying blessings over X.
As you can probably guess, the prayer has ultimately been more about me - the condition of my heart - than X. And after my daughter had a recent coffee date with X, I had a sort of epiphany, and I'm pretty sure I know who orchestrated the aha moment.
The epiphany is this: What if X is the answer to my prayer for daughter -you know, the friend to come alongside her as she grows a relationship with Christ? Wouldn't that just be a kick in the pants? Of course, it would, and that's certainly God's MO. He is the God of the unexpected who likes to remind us that we know nothing and He knows everything.
For now, time will tell. But I do have to admit that I laughed to myself in spite of myself at the thought. I have prayed for transformed heart - for both me and my daughter. We might just be getting a two-fer out of that one.
To be continued. . .
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